this summer has been filled with so many precious memories that i will live with for the rest of my life. i started my internship the day after mother's day and basically hit the ground running. what i thought was going to be another two weeks that the administrative assistant would be in Japan, soon turned into her moving there permanently. for the first month i had to play the part of the intern and the admin assistant. it was a very crazy time for frequency and fusion as i tried to pick up the pieces of someone else's life. as time went on life became somewhat easier. i got into the groove of everything and of life back home.
shortly after may i geared up for my 3rd missions trip, and my 2nd time back to Panama. i went down with feelings of nervousness and not really sure of myself. it my first time as a leader on a missions trip and i honestly didn't know what to expect. everyday though was truly amazing. everyday was a God moment and i never wanted it to end. on the second to last day i was talking to the director of YWAM and asked him what it would be like and if it was possible to do an internship the following summer. he said it was very possible and every day would be like it was on my missions trip. i just had to get approval from my college so that i would receive credit for it. i meet some great people, 1 adorable baby who has captured my heart, and reconnected with a great friend who poured into my life yet again.
3 days after returning from Panama i headed off to camp with 11 students. each of those students poured into my life and challenged my walk on an everyday basis without even knowing it. it was an absolutely amazing week where healings happened, lives were changed forever, and people were refreshed. that week blessed my life and really confirmed that youth was what i wanted to do for the rest of my life, but its always when you take a huge step out in faith that's when the enemy wants to push you back 3 more.
i got back into the office on the 5th of july the 1st time in about 20 some days. i had to try to get back into the routine again, which had changed since i had left. the new admin assistant had started working the day that i left for Panama, my youth pastor had left for Peru the day i came home from camp and the other intern was sick that day. i didn't know where to even begin. July slowly went by and i hadn't seen my youth pastor until the last week of July due to him going to Peru for 12 days (which felt like 50) and then going on vacation with his family.
August came very fast. we were gearing up for an outreach called the Big Serve. planning what the 3 days of that would be like, and getting ready to take 7 students to new jersey 2 days after that was over. the Big Serve went off with a bang and the students were looking forward to the homeless sleep-out which was the last night where the students slept outside like they would be homeless. i went home friday morning so exhausted and ready for my bed, which would only see me for about an hour or two. sunday night i headed back up to the church with my bag packed ready for a nice start to my week, and a time to recoup and settle my brain.
New Jersey was simply an awesome time, minus the stench that flooded into every pore of our bodies. we headed to Six Flags for a fun day, which we didn't know if that was going to happen. it had rained that morning and we were praying that it would turn into a great day. we got there and were paying for parking talking to the ticket holder who told us that the good rides where probably not going to be open at all that day. we got parked and headed into the park. we literally walked onto every single roller coaster and all the rides were open. it was a blast! the next day we headed to Ocean City, NJ and soaked up the sun. we made sand castles, turned the only boy other than our youth pastor into a mermaid, and wrote in the sand. we headed back home that night and part of me was left there with the 7 students on that beach. it was like i knew the time was dwindling away.
wednesday i walked into the office for the very last time trying my hardest to be strong. i kept telling myself that it was ok, that i would be back. i wasn't leaving forever. every wednesday we have praise and celebration where all the staff comes together and we talk about all the great and amazing things that God is doing in the church. the staff prayed over myself and the other intern. i just broke in that moment. from that moment on there was no stopping the water works that poured out of my eyes. that night was service and yet again there i was trying to be strong. at the end my youth pastor had all the students who were going off to college for the first time, and those who were going back to come up to pray over us. as about 5 girls came to pray over me all i could think was: "i could have done so much more. i missed something." its funny how in those moments God reaches down and just soothes every thing out and gives your heart peace again. i couldn't have done anything else, nor would i have done anything different this summer. i learned things about myself that i have never known, i fell in love with my Creator even more this summer, and i established relationships and friendships with students that will last a life time. thank you for all those who have made an impact on my life this summer, who poured into me, who have loved me and to those who more importantly prayed me through many storms. you will never know the whole impact that you have made on my life.
